It's 1:30 here and I'm still in my pajamas. I woke up at 11:30 to the sound of soft rain, got up to eat something, fed the dog, let him out, and went back to bed. So goes my life these days. I've been working nights in our local hospital's postpartum unit for a couple months now and tonight is a dreaded work night. I've got no problems sleeping during the day (other than neighbors' annoying dogs barking nonstop), no problems staying awake at night, and so far no scary moments on the 40-minute drive home, but I absolutely hate this! I wake up, eat a piece of fruit because anything more will set off the nausea, and suffer stomach issues the whole night. I've had a few lucky days where I've been able to eat and felt great, but those nights aren't enough to offset the bad nights. Digestive issues have always been a problem for me whenever I stayed up too late, so none of this surprises me.
Other than the shift itself, I love my job! I'm so happy to be working with healthy patients. Most of the time the situation is also a happy one. And of course I love working with the newborns! I'm getting more and more comfortable with handling them (you should have seen me when I was a student--so scared to break them!) and yes, I will occasionally cuddle them. Heel sticks for blood tests are also easy now and I actually like to do them now. Don't worry, they get a pacy with sugar water and sleep through it for the most part. My biggest challenge? Breast feeding! I think I get more frustrated than mom or baby when it's just not happening. I stress out when a baby won't eat. I'm not a breast feeding expert, nor do I have any personal experience with it, so just how am I supposed to be helping these moms breast feed more effectively? I am getting better at it, but I have to admit I get relieved when a mom comes in just wanting to formula feed. I know I'm horrible.
All this and more that I haven't mentioned are great preparation for me. In a few months time I will be that exhausted mom trying to get baby to latch on. I'll be the patient the nurse will walk in on, holding the baby and just gazing at him/her (I really do love walking in to that scene). Hopefully, I'll be better prepared than your typical first-time mom, but somehow I doubt I'll have less questions and I will be just as scared! I am so excited, hopeful, antsy, impatient, all-of-the-above and more. But for now, I need to rein in all this emotion and get to bed. Goodnight and happy Monday!